Night Thoughts

All the nature and/or projected-future documentaries and articles I've been watching/reading/consuming/falling asleep to lately have been incredibly depressing. Like so depressing I want to avoid that kind of informative entertainment altogether. I just want to watch some shit on mysterious jungle pyramids or the reticulated spider snake or traditional Laplander mating gloves.

Am I the only one?

Should I just explode my TV and mailbox and computer? I think I'm going to send National Geographic a bill. I think I'm going to send you all bills. Expect them shortly. Pay the bill or pay the price. Either way I get my pay. Unless you exploded your mailbox by then, you magnificent bastard, you.

When am I gonna evolve already? I am so over being trapped in the stagnant jizz era of Homo Sapiens time ditch. I've been considering morphing into Homo Syrupiens or Robo Sapphieriens or Chrono Sabretooths. I can't believe I'm this old and I don't have a machine gun yet. I KINDA THINK WE WERE PROMISED MACHINE GUNS. When is the next 4th of July? The only day that the world makes sense is the 4th of July.